Everyone, at some point in life, has had to ask for help—whether it’s reaching for something on the top shelf or asking someone to open a stubborn jar. These small, everyday acts of seeking assistance come naturally to most of us. But when it comes to our emotional well-being, asking for help can feel far more daunting. Why is it that seeking support for our mental health often feels so much harder?
We live in a generation where, in every direction, we hear it’s okay to reach out and that we should if we need it. Hotlines are advertised everywhere, stigmatization around therapy has decreased, and the importance of mental health is amplified. You can’t even scroll on TikTok for too long before the app sends a video asking if you’re okay and urging you to take a break from doom-scrolling. Despite the rise in support for mental health services, many of us still struggle to seek out help for ourselves. Why?
Understanding the Reluctance to Ask for Help
One possible reason for finding it hard to ask for help could be the cultural and societal pressures that look down upon vulnerability. For many years, strength translated into handling your problems alone. You weren’t supposed to show weakness, and asking for help was seen as the biggest weakness. Speaking about emotions in most communities is seen as “weird” and is not encouraged. Internal thoughts such as: “I should be able to handle this” and “People have bigger problems to deal with than me”–– can discourage many from reaching out, even when it’s urgent.
Another reason that can play a role is personal barriers. Things such as fear of judgment, appearing weak, or burdening others can hold many back from seeking help or support. The idea of opening up to someone—even a professional—feels intimidating when we’re already in a vulnerable place.
Why Asking for Help Is Harder Today
Modern life brings its own challenges. Our emphasis on productivity and the constant pressure to appear as if we have it all together can make asking for help seem like you are admitting defeat. A big contributor to this is social media. Everyone on social media aims to curate and show perfect versions of themselves which makes it easy to compare ourselves to others. This can cause individuals to feel isolated and inadequate when they are struggling.
A reduction in face-to-face interactions contributes to this problem even further. The major shift towards online communication has made in-person support systems that people have relied on weaker. This makes it even harder to initiate conversations about needing help. For some
groups, such as men and people of color, the pressure can be even higher due to societal stigmas that equate vulnerability with weakness.
The Cost of Not Seeking Help
Avoiding help can come with significant consequences. Mental health challenges that go unaddressed can worsen over time, leading to deeper feelings of isolation, anxiety, or depression. The impact isn’t just psychological; chronic stress can lead to physical health problems such as headaches, digestive issues, and compromised immune function.
Breaking the Cycle: How to Make Asking for Help Easier
To shift this mindset, we need to normalize vulnerability and see it as a form of courage rather than weakness. It’s important to build and maintain support networks—whether that means friends, family, or professional groups—where open conversations are encouraged. Small steps, like reaching out to a trusted friend or joining a supportive community, can make a significant difference.
Practical steps for reaching out can include simple strategies, such as preparing what you want to say in advance or starting the conversation with, “I’m having a hard time and could use someone to talk to.” Remember, asking for help doesn’t mean you’re failing; it means you’re taking control of your well-being.
While asking for help seems daunting, it’s an essential part of maintaining mental health and well-being. By recognizing the barriers and actively working to break them down, we can begin to view seeking support as a brave and necessary act. If you’re struggling, know that taking even a small step to reach out can make a world of difference.
At Georgetown Psychology, we understand how difficult it can be to take that first step toward asking for help. But you don’t have to face it alone. Our compassionate team provides the support and guidance you need to navigate life’s challenges. Take the first step toward feeling heard and supported. Contact Georgetown Psychology today.
By Sanjana Umashankar, college intern, and Dr. Divya Babbar
